


Only Fools

by Mr_MistyEyed



Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Highschool AU, M/M, Maybe - Freeform, Oneshot, Self Harm, some homophobic language, trigger warning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-03
Updated: 2016-07-03
Packaged: 2018-07-19 21:25:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,652
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7377946
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mr_MistyEyed/pseuds/Mr_MistyEyed
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Alternate Universe where on your eighteenth birthday, the name of your soulmate appears on your body. Tyler's Point of View. Oneshot.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Only Fools

**Author's Note:**

> Decided to take a break from Octagon of Homosexual for a little bit and write this oneshot for y'all.

I've waited practically my whole life for this. Soulmates. The concept has always fascinated me. Once you turn eighteen, you get a tattoo of the name of your soulmate. My mother and father found each other when they were just nineteen. 

I've always dreamt about what my soulmate will look like. She'll have dark, wavy hair and wide, bright eyes. She'll have a perfect smile, and her laugh will be the most amazing sound. She'll be perfect. And I'll know her name tomorrow. Hopefully, at least. 

I know that not all people find their soulmates. What if I don't actually have a soulmate? What if I don't get the mark on my skin tomorrow? What if I wasn't meant to be with anyone? Wouldn't surprise me. 

|-/

This is it. 

Today's the day

Tonight I'll know. 

The day couldn't be going any slower. By the time the evening comes, I'm so impatient I could probably explode. 

I'm laying in my bed now. I feel a sharp pain on my thigh. I jump up. 

It's now. 

I see the start of the first letter. 

J

J? What names start with j? Jenna, Julia, Jackie, Jessica, Jade, I can't think straight I'm so excited. 

O

Okay. I'm shaking. I close my eyes. The pain is really getting to me. Hopefully her name isn't too long. I'll just wait till it's over. 

Soon, the stinging stops. I cover my thigh with my hand. I slowly uncover it to see the rest of the name. 

S

H

Josh? JOSH? Thats a boy's name! I'm not gay! This must be a mistake. This can't be right. I can't do this. I can't show my parents. They'll kill me. 

I can't do this. 

I'm not gay. 

I can't do this. 

I'm not a sinner. 

I can't do this. 

|-/

It feels like hours have gone by, but I'm pretty sure it's only been minutes. 

My head is spinning. 

_You're a sinner,_ a voice in my head says. _A filthy sinner._

_You're no good. Take that razor._

Somehow, I've convinced myself this is a good idea. I grab the razor. 

_Faggot._

Cut.

_Worthless._

Cut. 

_Cut deeper, the pain will go away_ , the voice in my head says. 

I do what it says. 

The blade slices deeper into my skin. 

My vision's gone blurry. Blood is dripping down my leg. The name on my leg isn't readable anymore. It's covered in cuts. 

There's too much blood.

What have I done? 

I grab the tissues from my dresser and try to clean up the mess. 

I throw the razor away, but the voice in my head tells me I'll need it again soon. I try not to believe it. 

This is a mess. 

My vision has gone back to normal, and I feel somewhat okay, even though the voice, I've decided to call him Blurryface, keeps taunting me. 

What have I done?

I hate this. 

|-/

I open my eyes. It's morning. 

I'm on the floor. 

School. I have school today. 

There's dried blood going down my leg. I get into the shower to clean it off. I look down at my thigh and am reminded of what happened last night. 

My soulmate. Josh. A boy. I thought this would be so much easier than it's shaping up to be. 

_You're gay_ , Blurryface says. _Think about it. Have you ever REALLY been attracted to girls?_

"Shut up", I tell him. "I like girls. I'm straight. G-girls are... girls are h-hot."

_Face it. You can't even say it._

I don't want to think about this right now. 

I get out of the shower and put on clothes. I decide I can't wear shorts anymore because of the cuts and the name on my leg. 

I rush out the door to avoid my parents because I know they will ask me about my soulmate. I can't stand to think about what will happen if they find out. 

|-/

I'm at school and I can't focus. I usually do well in school, but I just can't do anything right today. 

_Or ever_ , Blurryface taunts. 

I try to ignore him, but it's getting harder. 

|-/

English class is where it all changes. 

Despite being the captain of the basketball team and having lots of friends, I'm honestly pretty alone. 

I sit at an empty table in the back. I don't want anyone to talk to me today. Or ever again. 

I'm not paying attention. I'm too busy lost in my thoughts, trying to shut Blurryface up. 

There's a new boy in my class. I think his name is John or something. I don't really care to find out. 

I see him. He stands out. His hair is dyed bright red. Not many people in this school dye their hair. He's different. 

He sits next to me. I don't know why me, of all people. There are enough empty seats in more desirable places around the room. 

"Why are you sitting here?", I ask. 

"Oh-uh... I'm s-sorry if you...uh...I-I'll move-" he's nervous. I don't want him to be. I don't know why I care so much. I don't even know him. 

"No, y-you're fine sitting here. I was just wondering why here, of all places...cause there are probably more interesting people to sit around than me..."

"I wanted to sit here. You seem... interesting... Are you sure I'm fine sitting here?"

"Yeah it's fine"

The boy's eyes are captivating. They're a mocha brown, with bits of gold. They crinkle up at the corners when he smiles. Oh my god, his smile. It's just so... perfect. I like him. 

_You're gay_ , Blurryface says. _You were just thinking about him, saying he's perfect. Look at you, you faggot._

"Were you staring at me?"

"N-no...I was just...uh...never mind." 

"Oh...sorry. Hey, I didn't get your name. I'm Josh."

Josh. No. It couldn't be. There are lots of Josh's in the world. It's not him. He's not your soulmate, Tyler. You're not gay. You're not falling for his deep brown eyes, and his perfect lips and the way he smiles. You're straight. Totally. 

"Sorry I've g-gotta go to the bathroom"

I rush out of the room and into the bathroom. Thankfully there's no one else in here. I need to think, alone. 

Josh. 

My soulmate?

I'm so confused. 

Am I gay?

Have I finally figured it out yet? It's pretty obvious that he could be my soulmate. 

Ugh. I don't know what to think. 

What if I tell Josh, and he hates me? 

I don't deserve him. Josh is so... so nice, and perfect, and attractive, and here I am. What am I? Nothing, compared to Josh. 

_Look at you_ , Blurryface says. _The captain of the basketball team, who cuts himself, and is falling for a guy. Everyone thinks your life is sooo perfect, but what are you? A fucking heathen._

I can't take it. I can't go back to class. I can't face Josh. I just need to calm down. 

I should probably get out of the bathroom now. I've been in here too long, people might get suspicious. 

I walk slowly back to class, looking down at the floor. I sit at my seat, and Josh is looking at me, confused. 

"What was that about? You just like, ran out of the room"

"Oh, nothing"

"Okay..."

The teacher, Mr. Grayson, is talking. I'm not paying attention to what he's saying. I do, however, catch two words. 

"...group project."

Fuck. 

I hate group projects. I'm always either stuck with someone I hate, or nobody wants to be my partner. 

"I will allow you to choose your partners. I trust you to make wise decisions."

Josh turns to me. 

"Hey uh... since I don't really know anyone else... do you want to...uh, be my partner?"

"Yeah, that... that would be great" I don't know why I'm so happy about this. I get to see Josh after school. 

You're not gay, Tyler. 

|-/

Josh and I are walked home to his house together. We're sitting on his bed. That's when I notice. 

He's wearing shorts. 

And right on his thigh, there's a name. 

My name. 

Tyler.

 _He's your soulmate, eh?_ , Blurryface says. _He'll find out eventually. He doesn't know your name yet. He'll know he's your soulmate, and then he'll want to see his name on your thigh. It's covered in cuts. He won't want you. You're worthless._

I can't deal with this right now. I try to shut Blurryface up. 

Josh notices me staring at his leg. 

"You're l-looking at the-the name on my leg." He covers it up with his hand, self-consciously.  
"Yeah I'm-I'm gay."

"Oh...uh..." 

"Wait. I never got your name."

"I'm... I'm Tyler."

Josh doesn't say anything at first. But he knows. It's me. We're soulmates. 

"Are you... you're my..."

"Yeah"

"My name's on your..."

"Yeah. On my leg."

Josh smiles. His smile is the best thing in the world. 

I'm so fucking gay. 

"Can I see?"

Fuck. 

"Um I...don't...I..."

"Come on Ty", he says gently. 

I roll up my pant leg. 

Josh gasps. 

I have tears in my eyes. 

So does he. 

"How could you... why did you..."

"I'm-I'm sorry", I sniff. "I fucked up. I understand if you... if you don't want- want me..."

"Tyler. You're fucking beautiful. Please don't do this to yourself. I-I care about you-"

My lips are on his. I don't know if this is a good idea or not yet, but Josh doesn't pull away. It just feels... right.

We pull apart. Josh looks into my eyes. 

"Promise me... promise you won't hurt yourself anymore. I love you, Tyler."

"I promise."

I snuggle up into his chest. He's perfect. And right now, everything is okay. 

At this point, I don't care what happens next. I don't care what my parents say. I'll have Josh by my side. 

Maybe, it'll all be okay, because I have _him._

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! I hope you liked it. I've never written a soulmate AU before.


End file.
